Martin O’Neill at the Scottish Cup quarter final on Sunday 8 March 2026. Photograph by Vagelis Georgariou
FATHER MARTIN AND SAMWISE GANGEE – 7/10 – Daizen off? But no Scratchy on? What? But then we realised the boss was looking for surprises over legs at that point, rolling the dice because… Well, he had nothing else left-field to throw at them from a depleted squad. Except some inspiring leadership – his team talk before ET appeared intense; like an angry Grandpa insisting you don’t ride yer bike across his newly-seeded lawn.
This was only superseded by SOM’s rousing huddle talk before the penalty shootout, where he held court with fluttering hands casting spells and invoking the Gods, with some kind of mystical gypsy magic. Watch closely and you’ll see him swish and flare up his fingers – twice – as if releasing something unseen up into the air. Then the Zombies go an sky two pens…
…Cue the X-Files theme.
MIBBERY – 5/10 – Offside? Less offside than Negan at The Sheep… A thrilling moment for Damien on VAR, only to be followed by the crippling realisation that punching balls into the net also isn’t allowed on global TV broadcasts. Meanwhile, pitchside , The Don did his best to set up a flurry of Celtic red cards by booking every ugly Zombie in the hope of later ‘evening it up’. Which only ended in despair as the Hoops maintained discipline and The Don bottled it from at least two clear Rangers reds.
VAR Review on Daizen’s goal. Scottish Cup quarter final on Sunday 8 March 2026. Photograph by Vagelis Georgariou
