THE best joke at the Edinburgh Fringe this year was this one…“Working at the jobcentre has to be a tense job,” Liverpool comedian Adam Rowe pointed out to his audience. “Knowing that if you get fired, you still have to come in the next day.”
Well, if you think that one was funny, here’s an even better belter, that will have you in stitches. It comes from a Northern Ireland comedian by the name of Kyle Lafferty.
“Everyone in the Rangers dressing room believes that we’ll get 55 and that this will be the year we’ll win the league,” he said with a straight face.
He’s coming to the end of his career, he knows Edinburgh well having played for Hearts, surely he’s got a big future at the Fringe with crackers like that one up his sleeve.
“It will be tough. Celtic have been champions for many years but we now have a squad that can compete,” Lafferty conceded. He didn’t show off the wounds he suffered after that ridiculous tackle by Scott Brown early in the match that happened right in front of the fourth official and Steven Gerrard – ‘Dive, Dive, Dive, Stephen it was a Dive,” the fourth official roared. Did Steven Gerrard really hear that? Who knows, he did hear ‘Foul, foul, foul,” when it suited him.
“Sunday was a disappointing result but with travelling and playing 38 minutes with nine men it was tough for us,” Lafferty continued. The Celtic Star did point out that there were advantages to Rangers playing in the Europa League this season, so getting passed the Russians in that Play-off was no bad thing for Celtic – see HERE.
“Obviously there is going to be no excuses for the performance we’ve put in and Celtic were probably the better team on the day but we are on a good road now and a good path and we’re going to kick on and we’ll be much closer to Celtic,” wait a minute Laff a minute man, ‘PROBABLY!’ ha ha ha..deluded! Here’s the real punch line though…
“Everyone in the Rangers dressing room believes that we’ll get 55 and that this will be the year we’ll win the league.”
Lafferty left the Rangers that had won 54 titles, quite a few on them through cheating right enough, but he was able to ‘walk away’ and didn’t feel he had any obligation to Rangers who had ceased to exist. Charles Green formed a new club and guys like Lafferty, McGregor, Naismith all walked away. Ally McCoist said that the players who walked away would have to ‘live with their decisions.” Lafferty bailed out to join Sion (pictured at top).
“We’ll just keep on working hard on the training ground. Obviously we have the Europa League as well so the games will come thick and fast and it’s a good place to be,” Lafferty contiunued with his routine.
Celtic, of course are well used to the punishing schedule in the autumn when the European group stages happen, Rangers are not. They are already 4 points behind Celtic and 7 behind leaders Hearts before they even get to the Group stage games.
But be careful out there folk, because Laff-a-Minute Lafferty reckons that the Rangers are coming!
“Darkness falls across the land, the midnight hour is close at hand…ha ha ha.’
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