SANDMAN’S DEFINITIVE RATINGS: CELTIC v SHE’S TURNED THE WEANS AGAINST US
“You can’t always get what you want, but if you try sometimes, you might find, you get what you need.” – Mick Jagger

THE FRIENDLY GHOST – 8/10 – “Tender is the ghost, The ghost I love the most. Hiding from the sun, Waiting for the night to come”. Who knew back then that Blur were writing a tune for us now about our new heroic goalie? It seems almost as prophetic as Kasper’s save: the first of that instantaneous double – when the world stood still – because the ball was past him. Yet, with prescience to rival Paul Atreides (see what I did there Dune fans?) Kasper’s mind and hands were ahead of it, clawing back to stop the fizzing volley crossing our line. Save of the season. And man of the hour as he signs on for another year of this Hooped insanity. Pleased to have you, Kasper. And your gloves that stuck like Lego to the final shot in the final seconds from the big ex-Zombie lobotomy; that sneaking in would have ended me…

GREGGS THE BAKER – 6.5/10 – Up-down, in-out, good and bad, on and off…His match sounds like a night with Jamesy (ladies…) but Greggs, so normally consistent, found himself often balancing uncharacteristic errors with surprisingly uplifting moments; stylish passes, winning penalties…Before falling to the raggedy virus after the
break, losing his way a bit, and being hooked as we attempted to reshuffle and regain a foothold.

WAYNE GRETZKY – 6.5/10 – Much like the weekend, AJ’s roving potency was quietened by the need for caution regarding big and mobile, possibly troublesome opponents. While not being neutered (it’s alright Jamesy…), he had to put in more of a considered professional game than be an aggressive creative force. Which he did, with solid credit.

CRUSTY THE CLOWN – 6.5/10 – Any doubts he could muster a physical persona to counter the athletic brawn of his direct opponents were thankfully rebuked. No squealing on the deck here holding his big toe, not in this heady atmosphere and not with such great glory at stake. So he stood up to it all; jumped up to it more like, winning decisive headers at the back and almost scoring one himself from a corner. Got through it all quite well, got us through it splendidly as a component of a strong defensive unit.
CONTINUED ON THE NEXT PAGE…