Sandman’s Definitive Ratings – Celtic v Stoned-Apis

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Kelechi Iheanacho of Celtic

Kelechi Iheanacho of Celtic shakes hands with Celtic Manager Brendan Rodgers as he is substituted for Benjamin Nygren. Celtic v Hibernian, Scottish Premiership, Celtic Park, – 27 September 2025. Photo Stuart Wallace IMAGO Shutterstock

THE NOTAPRODDYGAL – 6.5/10 – I mean, it’s like this – elite managers think out of the box? “Like, what if I double-bluff considered opinion and actually play the winger again who I’ve been explaining isn’t really in the right frame of mind to wear the Hoops at this moment? Not only that – when he’s also struggling deep in the game I’ll simply whip off the goalscoring centre-forward and put him back down the middle just like the other night when it backfired completely. Reverse psychology, or what?! Repetition is the mother of invention, right? I’m sure Albert Aristotle said that very thing. “Flam-in-jeen-yus! To the Gucci store!”

Referee Don Robertson

Referee Don Robertson Celtic v Hibernian, Scottish Premiership, Celtic Park, 27 September 2025. Photo Stuart Wallace/Shutterstock

MIBBERY – 6.5/10 – The Don strikes back. A clock can strike too but he’s never heard of one, hence his lackies in VAR and pitch-side just make up random numbers – always low as nobody can count above four… – during time-wasting and ensure reality can’t be reflected in anything they contrive. Also, make sure you book a couple of Bhoys for the optics – particularly if one’s just executed a tackle for the ages. Can’t have tackling in the modern game, can we? Not in that jersey. Absolute Zombie fanboys, the lot of them.

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About Author

The Celtic Star founder and editor David Faulds has edited numerous Celtic books over the past decade or so including several from Lisbon Lions, Willie Wallace, Tommy Gemmell and Jim Craig. Earliest Celtic memories include a win over East Fife at Celtic Park and the 4-1 League Cup loss to Partick Thistle as a 6 year old. Best game? Easy 4-2, 1979 when Ten Men Won the League. Email [email protected]

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