Daizen Maeda (The Maedanator) Facts…

He can’t be reasoned with, he can’t be bargained with. He doesn’t feel pity or remorse or fear and he absolutely will not stop. EVER.
He is Chuck Norris’s father.
He has counted to infinity three times.
Maeda knows Victoria’s secret.
He’s still at Ibrokes, closing down and tackling the ghosts of zombies past.
Death once had a near-Maeda experience.
He never wears a watch, he tells time what time it is.
He’s the reason Wally is always hiding.
He ran to the hospital when his mum gave birth to him.
Onions cry when he peels them.
Freddie Kruger has nightmares about Maeda.
On international duty, he just walks from Parkhead to south east Asia, leaving the morning of the game.

He’s the Duracell bunny’s surrogate da.
Covid-19 got a Maeda vaccine.
His hair is too scared to grow.
No push-ups, he does push-downs, pressing the Earth away from him.
He can hear sign language.
He never blinks.
Kevlar wears him for protection.
He can run for an hour in just 20 minutes.
Perpetual motion simply retired.
The Swiss military use Diazen Maeda Knives.

The sun can’t look directly at him.
When he drops the soap, other prisoners pick it up.
He wins arm wrestling competitions by staring.
He can kill two stones with one bird.
Celcius and fahrenheit use the Maeda temperature scale.
He carried Roger Bannister on his back during that four minute triumph.
He ran that fast he went back in time and, at half time, played 90 mins against the old r*ngers aswell.
Waiters leave tips for him.
Ghosts tell Maeda stories at the camp fire.
He ALWAYS gets paid for face painting.

..add your own DM barely believable fact in the comments section below, like this one…

Tarzan yells Maaaaeeeeeddddddaaaaaa

Docco

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