SANDMAN’S DEFINITIVE RATINGS: CELTIC @ THE UPSIDE-DOWN
“It’s fine to celebrate success but it is more important to heed the lessons of failure.” – Bill ‘Inject my jizz, peasants’ Gates.

Motherwell v Celtic, Scottish Premiership. 30 December 2025 Photo by Vagelis Georgariou (The Celtic Star)
THE FRIENDLY GHOST – 3/10 – The metaphor for the evening – Kasper struggling to pick a pass to a player who doesn’t really want a pass and we end up on our metaphysical arses as they’re handed to us. The dressing room revolt will start with him.
TONY THE TIGER – 4/10 – Battle-hardened Tony may be, but there’s only so much experience can do against raw energy and intensity. Run-ragged like the rest of the back three – though I’m reticent to overtly criticise the department of the team most exposed and least supported by the tactical set-up.

Motherwell v Celtic, Scottish Premiership. 30 December 2025 Photo by Vagelis Georgariou (The Celtic Star)
OF JUSTICE – 4/10 – As above, and we did see Liam get melted-in, taking a card. Out of frustration mostly, I’d presume, due to the frantic nature of his evening. Attempted to keep his cool, and probably did better than you… But he’s not suited to the role requested. Who is?

Despondent Celts. Motherwell v Celtic, Scottish Premiership. 30 December 2025 Photo by Vagelis Georgariou (The Celtic Star)
CRUSTY THE CLOWN – 5/10 MOTM – Alright, he got riled too and yellowed. But he went tit-for-tat against a right tit out to sabotage him with cartwheels and ankle-taps. Was going to critique for the first goal but on replays it’s an un-defendable ball – one in a million from O’Donnell – and if big Auston launches at it, he’s the one scoring. So I’d say this outing, though his lowest point since reinstatement, still provided us with a single pass-mark due to the newfound scrapper in him; applied himself manfully in a hopeless situation as puke-yellow jerseys swarmed him like jakey hornets after spilled Buckie.

Motherwell v Celtic, Scottish Premiership. 30 December 2025 Photo by Vagelis Georgariou (The Celtic Star)
KATIE – 4/10 – And so to the fall of Wilifred Nancy, #1. Hooking stalwarts at half-time raises a number of red flags, and most probably will be followed by a bureaucratic red card. But more of that later…And in the vein of dark irony, KT had appeared the one and only most likely to make any inroads during the first-half, bursting through a couple of times to get crosses in. That’s enough of that, garcon, off you come…
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Excellent, if depressing synopsis David. Invest some time in mentoring your colleagues in the art of fine writing in 2026….
Difficult to disagree with any of that and it’s about time you got brutal with certain players.
This is the poorest Celtic team I’ve watched, since the eighties, just dire. Far too many just not good enough, or just stale. Absolutely awful at the back, a goalie who gives me palpitations with every attempted piece of ‘distribution’, a midfield with zero creativity, including the captain, a succession of wingers who, simply, just can’t cross a ball and a raft of strikers who couldn’t score in the old ‘Palais de Dance!’
If we don’t have better than that, in the academy…..then what’s the point of an academy.
Nancy , Tisdale and most of the Board who formed a concensus to bring these two Saboteur (Duds) to Celtic Park should be instantly dismissed . Add to that , get rid of the over-rated players commanding good salaries with Celtic , starting with :- Engels , Hetate , Tierney , McCowan , Yang , Ralston , McGregor ( who , like Brendan before him ) is off to SAUDI to continue their jersey kissing in warmer climes .
It could take years to sort-out this mess —-Time for an instant S.O.S. to ANGE and Martin O’ Neil —-Who would hopefully come to oversee a REBUILD and put our Great Club back to where it should be in both Scotland and Europe . In the past we have had some crap players who lacked ability but made-up for this with effort and pride in the jersey they wore sadly those days are gone with crowd of impostors who now wear the Celtic shirt .
Jock Stein said that , ” The Celtic jersey did not shrink to fit inferior players ” , unfortunately , it has shrunk for many over the last few seasons .