SANDMAN’S DEFINITIVE RATINGS: CELTIC v THREE-CARD…
“Boredom slays more of existence than war.” – Norman Mailer
Celtic line-up prior to the UEFA Europa League 2025/26 League Phase MD2 match between Celtic FC and SC Braga at Celtic Park on October 02, 2025. (Photo by Ian MacNicol/Getty Images)
THE FRIENDLY GHOST – 3/10 – Kasper.Kasper! KAAASPER!! “Uh,hhhh… Like, what, man?” The ball – save it! “Ba…Uh, you mean the technicolour frisbee the beautiful hippy chick with the flowers in her hair is floating towards me across this sun-kissed San Fransico parkland as Barry McGuire’s ‘Eve Of Destruction’ tune is playing on some dude’s transistor radio, man? Well… Wai…Wait an’ I’ll flap at it and see if I can catch…Aw, man… Bummer… It’s gone past me, man, and there’s a lot of heaaavy noise, y’know – dudes givin’ me grievance. Like, hey… Chill, y’know. Wow, man, this is trippy…” Kasper was stoned; Evidence that kicking of his, too, and it’s the only logical answer. Call Vinny, his time has come.
Colby Donovan in action during the UEFA Europa League 2025/26 League Phase MD2 match between Celtic FC and SC Braga at Celtic Park on October 02, 2025. (Photo by Ian MacNicol/Getty Images)
MELLOW YELLOW – 4/10 – Nothing like boosting a kid’s confidence by hooking him at the break. Looked a bit shaky during his time on the park, or maybe rather ‘raw’ is the correct summation; still not too much of a negative because he’ll give 100% regardless of how his form is.
KATIE – 5.5/10 – Not the KT we ordered but still the battling fan in a jersey who’ll not go down without a fight. Could have scored himself tonight, looked comfortable in central defence for the second period. He’s not the problem.
OF JUSTICE – 6/10 – Liam in Europe is consistency. Liam getting exposed in Europe is a personal battle he wins despite being the stooge for some woeful passing than had him under pressure and facing up cul-de-sacs. Thankfully the Barndarigg Beckenbauer gene maintains vital composure. But we all know what Liam’s nightmares must consist of.
GET CARTER – 6/10 – Effective at right back; maybe more than centre, due to the freedom it gave him to motor at their lines. Another who’s not part of the problem when he’s on his game.
Callum McGregor arrives at Celtic Park ahead of the UEFA Europa League 2025/26 League Phase MD2 match between Celtic FC and SC Braga at Celtic Park on October 02, 2025. (Photo by Ian MacNicol/Getty Images)
CALMAC – 4/10 – Calmac is stifled. By these tactics. By his solo role amid athletic frenzies across the most sought-after territory on the pitch. His isolation – although not planned tonight, but came to pass – means he’s bereft of forward-momentum and maintains equilibrium by ball-retention; hence we’re recycling back and side in multiples of unnecessary rotations. Not a lot he can personally do to remedy his situation; not while he’s paddling around in there frantically trying to keep himself and us above water, never mind imposing upon the game or creating chances.
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Try giving comments about the game and players, without silly feckin names and smart arsed comments,your normally bang on with article but don’t need crap
Can you not read Charlie? It’s “ratings” he gives, not comments about the game. And they are definitive too.
Thanks for playing, Charlie.
Murray(22 not a kid) won’t make it – this was a characteristic goal-conceding mistake per game from him, e.g. A Villa last season, Queens Park when he didn’t play to whistle on touchline thinking ball had gone out of play.
Prodgers could not identify a talented player if Lubo gave him a two-footed kick up the ass. Watch McArdle(18) shine at Partick where his manager will pick him not consign him to the scrapheap for outperforming the entire 1st team at Pittodrie last season.
Criticise the MIBs and then give them 9/10 ???